I would argue to say it draws you closer to God. And that probably sounds really weird and wrong at first glance. No, I’m not saying it’s in the Bible or God has told us to not get education, or training, or experience. I AM saying every human has had to adopt this motto at some point or another to get THROUGH something and continue forward– and not become stagnant–because none of us have ALL of the answers. So let me explain.
Is “fake it till you make it” bad advice, a convenience, or something that ACTUALLY gets us through?
I can’t count the number of times people have said this to me as advice or a temporary solution for the unknown. I think for some people it provides a level of comfort within ignorance, reassuring them: “Oh, I can just pretend I have it figured out and chances are, everything will be fine.” (that approach seems a little extreme in my opinion and not exactly the angle I’m taking as an ultimate way to live).
I WANTED to feel that settling from this phrase. I wanted to feel like I could temporarily sweep my lack of knowledge under the rug because that’s what someone ELSE told me to do. But I felt more like: I cannot “fake” anything. I don’t do fake. I can’t deceive people to think I’m something I’m not and then also reap the BENEFIT of being a fraud.
The result: I wouldn’t try or participate in anything that I wasn’t TRULY knowledgeable of or qualified for. I felt too uncomfortable to jump into something knew or give myself any title I wasn’t deserving of. That left me with….a whole lot of nothin.
**When you have to be an expert at everything to even take the first step, you’ll find that you limit your options in life to….a bunch of logical paths and about zero dreams.
Whether we want to admit it or not, all of us have “faked” MOST of anything we’ve done that was actually WORTH doing.
Now being in my mid twenties, I’ve realized that I’ve literally “faked” everything I’ve ever done— because everything you do is NEW the first time you do it. (If you’ve never had to fake it…maybe you’ve never had the courage to try a lot of priceless experiences…)
I faked calm self-composure on probably every date I had ever been on.
I faked knowing how to move clear across the country.
I sometimes fake it when I’m being “confident” in striking up conversations.
I faked knowing how to start this blog or even write blog posts! (Sorry. Hope you don’t feel betrayed.)
Does this mean you have to pick between being “a fake” or being a dud?
Nope. I’m going to tell you what I feel this phrase “fake it till you make it” can really mean in your life and what it can do for you. And before you beat up on yourself, the reality is this: should you expect yourself to know how to navigate new things before ever learning them?
If not, does that mean every first time doing something, you’re doing it as a phony and a liar?
I’m sure you’ve already said “no” in your head because NO ONE would say yes.
Stepping into something new is called TRYING
So how can I do this with God?
The other day I felt God tell me, “Try not to look at ‘fake it till you make it’ like YOU’RE a fake.” Okay…then what is it? He said,
“Start believing that when you decide to continue forward with no tutorial, minimal answers, and only partial understanding, what you’re saying is ‘None of this can be done successfully or AT ALL if it’s not God doing it. I’m going to move forward doing what He’s called me to even if I don’t fully know how — He does. That officially gives me permission to believe I can walk ahead before I know what the end looks like.”
When I embark on something that I don’t feel qualified for, I want to tell myself that it is actually 100% okay to “fake it till I make it” — but here’s the twist:
I’m not going to believe in my own confidence and abilities. I’m believing that where I lack, He’ll fill in. He’ll show up.
Take a first-time mom for example:
Look at a first-time mom. She’s up every hour of the night. She’s confused when the baby won’t eat, or is continuously crying, or looks a funny color. She’s PRAYING to know what to do because she loves this human more than she can express.
No one looks at her fighting to figure out the answers and thinks, “Well, they should know what they’re doing. If they don’t the answers then they shouldn’t have become parents.”
No. She isn’t “being a fake mom” because she doesn’t know what she’s doing. She is a mom. She is a parent. No one would argue with that and that is the title she gets to carry proudly on her journey to discovering the answers. But her only way to do that is to have the baby– is to do the new thing.
She’s saying, “I’m going to do my best even without answers because this is for something BIGGER than me. I’m going to ask the Lord for each next step. I’m going to pray for answers and direction.”
All the while, she is 1 trillion percent a parent.
But, she is a parent relying on what He can do, not what she can do.